WODO: Wisdom Of a Dungeon Owner

by Uncle Abdul

WODO?

Yes, WODO … Wisdom Of a Dungeon Owner.

Well, I’m not really an owner (of The South Bay Spot). I share that responsibility with others, but I sure do a lot of work there.  Sometimes I reflect on little encapsulations of bits of wisdom, wits, and whimsy accumulated over the years and also while going through my current dungeon cycle. Some of it is wise. Some of it is whimsy. And some of it is poignant. But I do present it here for your amusement and edification. Please don’t expect deep thoughts or the wisdom of the ages or even any semblance of order. Mostly it’s my attempt to keep a balance …and, oh yes, to keep me sane ☻.

As a side note, owing to my increased involvement working for a consulting client and the fact that the original San Jose location was being sold, I stepped down from the Board of Directors as of November 1st, 2016. New people have been trying to redo the Spot with, so far, limited success.

 

~~~WODO ~~~

  • 1.) I once said to a friend, “You can make a small fortune in owning and running a dungeon. You just need to start with a large one.“
  • 2.) To successfully run a dungeon you need to be a cross between Gandhi, Machiavelli, and Attila the Hun. …and I’m beginning to like my inner Attila ☺
  • 3.) Always remember your members. They’ll help you build it, run it, and stand behind it and you in time of trouble.
  • 4.) It’s very true in business — as it is with running a dungeon — “A first-class manager hires first class people because (s)he wants the best results, whereas a second-class manager will hire third class people …largely because s(he)’s afraid of the competition.” My corollary to this is, “You hired/appointed them because they’re the best in what they do, so trust them and let them do it.“
  • 5.) Safe, Sane, Consensual …hey! 1 or 2 outta 3 ain’t bad
  • 6.) Was mich nicht umbringt, macht mich stärker wachsen … außer für Bären. Bären wird mich umbringen.
  • 7.) Paraphrasing Helmuth von Moltke, “The battle plan is only good until the first shot is fired“. One would be a fool not to expect surprises. Ya gotta be flexible and be able roll with the punches.
  • 8.) Work to the Mission …Not to the script.
  • 9.) Everyone makes mistakes. Admit yours, do the right thing around it, and move on.
  • 10.) Go for the bestest for the mostest — paraphrasing Spock-1.0
  • 11.) Don’t sweat the small stuff.
  • 12.) Include ME time into your plans.
  • 13.) “It’s nice being King.” — Mel Brooks. But remember too, “Memento interno vires.”
  • 14.) “Don’t let it go to your head kid” — Hans Solo to Luke Skywalker during a battle
  • 15.) “Make sure you’re right, then go ahead” — Davy Crockett
  • 16.) Doing something sub-optimally may not be as good as doing something optimally, but it sure as shit beats doin’ nothin’.
  • 17.) “In a game of wits, never come half prepared” — some guy named Anon
  • 18.) If things seem to be coasting along, you’re probably going downhill.” — same guy, Anon
  • 19.) “It is better to remain silent and let people think you a fool rather than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.” — Ben Franklin
  • 20.) Never… feed trolls
  • 21.) “The buck stops here” — Harry S. Truman
  • 22.) Rumors are like cockroaches. They’re disgusting and spread rapidly. However, unlike cockroaches which can be killed by bug spray, rumors not killed by the truth just crawl to hide and fester in the woodwork.
  • 24.) When a trolling detractor disses you, it says more about them than it does you. Pay attention to it anyway. You can use it later.
  • 25.) On the other hand, listen to well-intentioned, honest criticism (usually marked by being given to you in person and in private). This… often proves valuable.
  • 26.) “Nie mój cyrk; nie moje małpy.” — Polish proverb
  • 27.) “Illegitimi non carborundum.” — a macaronic Latin aphorism
  • 28.) Remember to keep your perspective if there’s no epidermis coming off your proboscis. Even if there is, keep your perspective.
  • 29.) The takeaway lesson from the Cliff Notes version of Sun Tzu’s “The Art of War”:   Know yourself — Know your adversary — Know the territory
  • 30.) Notary Sojac — Smokey Stover
  • 31.) “All bring happiness into your life — Some by their arrival — Some by their leaving” — another one by Anon
  • 32.) Never push a loyal person to the point of where they don’t care.
  • 34.) “You don’t waste good” — L. J. Gibbs, NCIS, Rule #5
  • 35.) “Never take anything for granted” — L. J. Gibbs, NCIS, Rule #8
  • 36.) “When the job is done, walk away” — L. J. Gibbs, NCIS, Rule #11
  • 37.) “Always work as a team” — L. J. Gibbs, NCIS, Rule #15
  • 38.) “Sometimes — You’re wrong” — L. J. Gibbs, NCIS, Rule #51
  • 39.) “You don’t have to gild the lily” — wisdom of my fraternal grandmother
  • 40.) You’re never right all the time. Instead, go for a net gain in solutions.
  • 41.) A little known fact about Marketing Research: surveys and focus groups only tell you what people don’t want. Only when people are asked to reach into their pockets and shell out their own money do you really find out what they do want. — from my friend, Zed, a former Marketer.
  • 42.) You’ve probably oft heard “It’s the squeaky wheel that gets the grease“. True, but greasing that wheel ain’t gonna do you squat if the ox pulling the cart drops dead from you not feeding it. Yes, pay attention to the complainer, but not at the neglect of keeping the organism alive.
  • 43.) The only ‘prize‘ you get from a pissing contest is yellow, wet shoes.
  • 44.) “The only man who never makes a mistake is the man who never does anything.” — Teddy Roosevelt
  • 45.) “Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure… than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much, because they live in a gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat.” — Teddy Roosevelt
  • 46.) “People ask the difference between a leader and a boss. The leader leads, and the boss drives.” — Teddy Roosevelt
  • 47.) “The best executive is one who has sense enough to pick good people to do what he wants done, and self-restraint enough to keep from meddling with them while they do it.” — Teddy Roosevelt
  • 48.) “You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.” — Winston Churchill
  • 49.) “Just because some people are fueled by drama doesn’t mean you have to attend the performance” — Cheryl Richardson.com
  • 50.) “Speak kindly to the erring; Thou yet may’st lead them back, With holy words and tones of love, From misery’s thorny track. Forget not thou hast often sinned. And sinful yet must be; Deal gently with the erring one, As God hath dealt with thee.” — Julia Abigail Fletcher Carney
  • 51.) Trying to have a conversation with some people is like arguing with a dining room table — after Barney Frank, former Independent Congressman from Massachusetts and in the 2016 race to become a Presidential Candidate
  • 52.) “Sometimes it’s hard to remember that the initial objective was to drain the swamp when you’re up to your nose in alligators” — same guy Anon
  • 53.) When you’re in a 52 situation (see above) and someone chimes in touting the precision and organization in the military, remind them that the US Military has had 250 years to develop and yet still experiences SNAFUand FUBAR.
  • 54.) There is a poem, Walk a Mile in His Moccasins by Mary T. Lathrap in 1895. Keep trying to remember that (despite though being in a 52situation — above) even though a detractor may not (or deliberately disregards it). And keep in mind also No. 2 above.

Ty Cobb – .366 – #1
Rogers Hornsby – .358 – #2
(Shoeless) Joe Jackson – .356 – #3
Ed Delahanty – .346 – #4
Tris Speaker – .345 – #5
Ted Williams – .344 – #6
Billy Hamilton – .344 – #7
Babe Ruth – .342 – #8
Harry Heilmann – .342 – #9
Pete Browning – .341 – #10

NOTE: That NONE of them hit even .500 (half the balls pitched at them), but they were still the BEST. Remember that when either you or your staff hit a glitch or screwed up in running your dungeon — see Rule #9 above, you can still accomplish a great job and a great dungeon even if you make (non fatal) errors. And if a detractor or troll disses or “shouts to high heaven” about “not running the dungeon perfectly“, refer him(er) to this…especially if they haven’t done squat in helping the club or dungeon out.

Admittedly the difficulty in hitting a baseball coming at you at 80 to 90 mph with a bat is far greater than, perhaps, running a dungeon, but you get my point.

  • 56.) It’s OK to lose a battle or two, just don’t loose the war.
  • 57.) It ain’t always easy, but it’s always worth the effort to try doing what you think is right.
  • 58.) Though some think it disgusting (and not entirely unwarrantedly so), Anger can be a useful motivating tool in your arsenal. Just use it wisely — never maliciously — and never, ever let either your ego or your dick be in control of it.
  • 59.) “I shall continue to do what I think is right, whether anybody likes it or not.” — Harry S. Truman
  • 60.) When you slip up (see #’s 9 and 40 above) don’t spend a lot of time on your initial OMG! (read: AH SHIT!!!). Instead, find out the details of what happened and seek a systemic solution first. There’ll be plenty of time to kick yourself in the ass LATER. SOLUTIONS ARE MORE IMPORTANT THAN REGRETS.
  • 61.) If, as a dungeon/club owner/runner, you’re looking to be universally admired and/or loved, boy, YOU’RE IN THE WRONG BUSINESS. You need to expect that there’ll be some people out there who’ll think you’re the next worse (or worse than) thing to the Antichrist. Get use to it, but don’t over-react. Only worry about it if more than a third of your members think the same way.
  • 62.) “Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves.” ― Confucius
  • 63.) “When the winds of change blow, some people build walls and others build windmills” — Chinese proverb
  • 65.) If it takes more than 20 e-mails or texts (and even that’s too many) to get information or solve a problem, you’re doing it wrong.
  • 66.) Running a dungeon will break your heart, drive you nuts, and cause you sleepless nights, but it’s all worth it when you see the people playing and enjoying themselves.
  • 67.) “I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.” — George Bernard Shaw
  • 68.) A club owner/manager’s vision for it needs to inspire its members, not dictated to them.
  • 69.) When faced with a situation where someone is trying to “game” you or the club, it’s best to consider the use of a technique I learned in ESTtraining. Werner Erhard (really John Paul Rosenberg) said,

● “Determine what the game is and its rules,”
● “Decide if you want to play,” then
● “Play the game.”

BUT… don’t do so at the detriment of the club

  • 70.) “Do what you feel in your heart to be right- for you’ll be criticized anyway. You’ll be damned if you do, and damned if you don’t.” — Eleanor Roosevelt
  • 71.) A quote: “Character in many ways is everything in leadership. It is made up of many things, but I would say character is really integrity. When you delegate something to a subordinate, for example, it is absolutely your responsibility, and he must understand this. You as a leader must take complete responsibility for what the subordinate does. I once said, as a sort of wisecrack, that leadership consists of nothing but taking responsibility for everything that goes wrong and giving your subordinates credit for everything that goes well.” — Dwight D. Eisenhower
  • 72.) “Apply just the right amount of force — never too much, never too little. All of us know of people who have failed to accomplish what they set out to do because of not properly gauging the amount of effort required. At one extreme, they fall short of the mark; at the other, they do not know when to stop.” –Jigoro Kano

72A.) Corollary: A new apprentice big engine mechanic asked of the experienced, oldtimer mechanic to what torque a bolt needed to be tightened to. The oldtimer replied “One quarter turn less than it takes to shear off the head of the bolt, kid.” Lesson: it takes experience gained from trial — and yes, failure — to know where that point is.

  • 73.) In investigating a site for your dungeon, always check out the neighbors. Ask your landlord about them. Look at the neighborhood. Why? Well, every once in a while there’s a troublemaker amongst them, and they can cause a tremendous amount of grief to the club.
  • 74.) One of the worst reasons to start a dungeon or club is for spite, i.e., getting pissed off at some leader, shaking ones fist, and yelling “I’m going to start my own club”. The Bay Area dungeons and clubs are replete with this tactic. It’s been done many times. Often the spite clubs fail. I’ve only seen one success since 1980.
  • 75.) Yes, clubs and dungeons do have coups. Sometimes they’re hard to avoid. Very often they fail to live up to their promises, and often degenerate into “my way or the highway” dictatorships. If this is your situation, perhaps the best strategy (or at least one to consider) is to bow out. Make sure you protect your friends and supporters when you do.
  • 76.) Progress is never linear, neither is it always forward. Just go for a net gain in solutions.

 

published by permission, @copyright Uncle Abdul, member, Board of Directors, BED
source: https://fetlife.com/users/5028/posts/2572244